Blame Victoria Beckhem

 

Was wearing oversized glasses a conscious decision by women?

A friend and I were discussing the attractiveness loop hole a large portion of women seem to exploit most recently, and it’s wearing oversized shaded luxury glasses. These often times, brightly colored, darkly shaded, “take-up 2/3 of your face” sized sun glasses have now become the premier fashion accessory. I suppose my friend and I forget how important the area from the top of the eyebrow to the bottom of the nose actually is on women. Sure legs, butts, breast, hair, arms, stomachs, and the rest defiantly help sway a decision, but the face is often over looked and taken for granted. Some women won’t leave the house until they’ve put on these snowboarding goggles regardless that the weather outside is overcast with an 80% chance of rain and utter lack of sunlight. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not against fashion, trends or raising one self esteem through clothing, but this occurrence is getting out of hand.

My friend and I feel it’s yet again, another way women have found to falsely project attractiveness. With a combination of eye shadows, high heels, hair extensions, and push up bra’s it’s becoming more and more difficult to see a woman’s beauty for what it is. Now couple that with these masking sunglasses, women are basically wearing an outer shell of manufactured beauty. I just wanted to know whether or not if this was a conscious decision by women to wear these type of glasses and make it a trend for reasons listed above or did these glasses simply become fashionable because of their functionality. Covering up ½ of your face may mean one doesn’t have to apply makeup everyday and can still be consider attractive. Covering up ½ of one’s face may lessen the occurrence of certain types of skin cancers. Or perhaps women really have figured out that wearing these glasses actually preserves this false sense of attractiveness for these women who are fugly between the eyebrows and bottom cheeks area?

 

If you have a pair of these glasses, ask yourself if you’re wearing these glasses because they look good or because it makes “YOU” look better than you actually are? And what else will you wear next to cover up?

Objective Sexuality=Seriously screwed up people

Is the human psyche that fragile?

 

So I was watching this documentary about individuals who posses “Objective Sexuality”. And it got me thinking, what the HELL is wrong with people? How do we justify some of our actions? What went developmentally wrong and where? Or better yet, is there no longer a standard of normalcy yet a sea of human beings all screwed up aspiring to the unattainable?

 

For those of you who may not know, Objective Sexuality is the condition when people or animals (usually people) develop strong psycho-sexual and emotional attachments to inanimate objects. A co-morbid condition which uses mild displacement and Aspergers syndrome to help a person develop projected characteristics for inanimate objects.

 

Basically it was a 40 min BBC documentary about a bunch of north eastern European women falling in love with bridges, walls, towers, bows, banister, and in one rare case a guillotine. It starts with a woman who is standing in front of the Golden Gate bridge, who believes that the bridge communicates telepathically to her. She then proceeds to describe her deep desire to make love to a piece of the Golden Gate Bridge, and how she hopes “HE” will be able to feel it. Second is a woman who is an inanimate whore lover. This second woman is in love with both a bridge and wall and is married to a tower. The last woman was a world class archer who dumped her boyfriend who taught her archery to only end up falling in love with the BOW. A bow named fucking Lance. This bitch had a man, but chose to drop that for the inanimate object her previous love brought her. I thought it was spoof on a documentary I watched a couple months back about a bunch of men who fell in love with life size sex dolls. I was sadly mistaken. These women were dead serious. Some go on to talk about their lust and subsequent sexual relations with pieces of these inanimate objects. One woman is even caught trying to f**k the Eiffel tower.

 

What the HELL man?!

 

There are men in this world who can’t speak with or handle interactions with women so they run to life size sex dolls and give them fantasy characteristics. And now we have women who can’t deal in “normal” relationships with men or women and run to inanimate objects for affection. Where did it go so wrong? As assumed, many of these women have suffered from some sort of mental defect or traumatic childhood.

 

My question is, how is it that some people handle life much better or differently,( because there can’t be a standard anymore when people are doing things like this) than others?

People who grew up in foster homes never knowing their families go on to lead healthy lives and raise families of their own. Individuals who have seen friends die in their arms go on to help mentor and tutor others on lose and tragedy. Women who have been raped, go on to live and eventually trust again. People who have lost practically everything and yet maintain optimistic hope. Individuals who should have every right to fall apart mentally but don’t. And then there are people who were slapped a little too hard one time in the middle of a Walmart when they were in 2^nd now grow up to f**k dead little woodland creatures they name Judith. How does this happen?

 

Is the human psyche that fragile, or are people looking for ways to grab as much shocking attention as possible, because it’ll validate their very pathetic lives?

Go to Ticketmaster…do not pass Go!

Is it me or has Ticketmaster gotten out of control?

 

I was looking up ticket prices the other day, to a concert I was really enthused to see, but after adding up the nonsense fees Ticketmaster feels compelled to tack onto a single ticket, I had to pass. It’s f-ing ridiculous, a ticket starts off at 35.00 bucks and ends up forcing someone to pull out a second mortgage on their home once Ticketmaster gets their talons into it.

 

Actual Ticket Fee:

$60.00

 

Ticket Master Fee:

Convenience Charge: $6.50-13.45 (Convenience from what? I still have to pay an extra 12.00 or so to mail them, or 2.50 to print them, or 2.50 to drive to the venue and present my id to pick them up. How is this additional 6.50-13.45 charge making my life convenient?)

 

Building Facility Fee: $1.50-4.50 (I’m confused…isn’t this what my $60.00 is paying for as well?)

 

Self Print Fee: $2.50 (Why am I being charged to use my own ink and printer to print the tickets I just paid for?)

 

Retail Outlet Pick Up Fee: $1.00 (Why am I being charged to pick them up? I just paid for them and now I have to pay an extra dollar each to actually put them in my hand once I get to the venue)

 

Customers in other Countries pick up by will Call: $2.50 (Is this a ransom fee? Was my $60.00 dollar not good enough you need an extra 5 bucks from me?)

 

 

It used to work like this: Artists (or their management) figure out how much it will cost to tour. They present promoters with a price (known as a guarantee). If promoters think they can make enough money to pay the guarantee and make a profit, they’ll book the show. A ticketing agent like Ticketmaster makes no money from the price of the ticket, so it profits by charging various service fees.
Everyone in this arrangement is making plenty of money. Ticket sales in North America last year rose 7 percent to $4.2 billion, according to trade industry magazine Pollstar, though as in recent years, the growth comes from selling fewer tickets at higher prices. Ticketmaster in 2008 reported third-quarter revenues of $339.2 million, up 16 percent over the previous year.

 

I ask if, most artist have signed with Live Nation to promote their concerts, and Live Nation merges with Ticketmaster, how is this not a monopoly? What’s to stop this merger from adding more shenanigan fees to tickets.

Fees like:

Staging Fee: Charging the fans for the stage set up fee.

Production Fee: Charging the fans for production cost.

Grouping Fee: Charging the fans the cost of the artist entourage fees

Concession Fee: Charging the fan the cost of food and liquor for the entire tour for the artist and their entourage.

Trust Fee: Charging the fan for the cost of the artist retirement fees.

So if artists, promoters and ticketing agencies are making so much money, the real question is, who’s getting screwed?

People are Asses

Why are people asses? So at lunch the other day I probably witness one of the most humiliating scenes I could imagine. Worst than a one nut balding fat man with halitosis trying to pick up on Megan Fox. I was at a Subway and happened to be positioned behind some brimstone demon from hell. This woman must have been in her late 40’s, dressed in one of those stupid ass valor jumpsuits with “juicy” written on the ass. A bright blue and white advertisement drawing everyone’s attention to the ass she didn’t have. (Side note: if you aren’t blessed with the body of J-Lo circa 2000, or any video vixen, don’t wear this jumpsuits out in public. You’re embarrassing yourself and the fabric of valor.)

This woman must have been one of those wives who spends her husband’s money all day trying to humiliate publics service attendants because at home her husband makes her feel like a shell of woman with his open infidelity and verbal berating of her family and her quickly decreasing looks. Either way she found her way through a break of coke snorting and a shopping marathon to belittle her next victim in this Subway.

I understand there is an inherit control Subway bestows on its customers. You go in, Subway has the ingredients, you practically make your sandwich, easy enough. But ever so often (more often than not) there are these individuals who take this formula and clutch it in their tyrannical claws and rip it to shreds.

 

I shit you not, this was the encounter:

Subway dude (SD): Hello miss, welcome to Subway, what can I get you today? (keep in mind he’s smiling at this point)

Valor Bitch (VB): I know you’re gonna get this wrong, so I’ll speak slow. You guys always mess up my order. (Stone face behind a pair of oversized sunglasses)

SD: Uh…I’m sorry to hear that, well what can I get you today?

VB: Ok, I want two sandwiches, one on wheat and the other on…wait what type of bread does the sweet onion chicken teriyaki come on?

SD: Whatever type of bread you like…

VB: No that’s not what’s in the picture!…What’s that bread in the picture?

SD: Oh in the picture…Italian.

VB: Italian? Uh…no…no…I’ll just have it on white.

SD: Ok, and the second sandwich?

VB: Let’s just do this one first!

SD: Ok. So everything on it?

VB: Did I say everything on it? No.

SD: Would you like this toasted?

VB: It’s not toasted in the picture, have you made this before?

SD: Uh, yes miss. Ok…lettuce, cheese tomato, onions, green peppers, olives and pickles?

VB: A little lettuce, two tomatoes, no cheese, no onions, a “smidge” of olives, no green peppers and no pickles. And none of that…that…sauce stuff.

SD: The sweet on sauce? Would you like to try some of it.

VB: Sure.

SD: Here you go.

VB: Uhhhhggg!! Why would you put that on a sandwich? I hope you warn people before putting that crap on their sandwiches. There should be a sign put up.

SD: Uh…so that’s a no…?

VB: Yeah, and you shouldn’t be putting that on any other sandwiches.

That’s sandwich number one. The guy is now no longer smiling.

SD: And the second….?

VB: I want a turkey and ham sandwich on wheat.

 SD: Ok, what would you like on it?

VB: Well this one needs to be made in three parts. I want turkey on one third of it, ham on the other and both on the last.

SD: Uhhhhh….

VB: Swiss cheese on the 1/3 with turkey, American on the 1/3 with ham and peppercorn on the one with both.

SD: Uhhhh….

VB: Light onions on the 1/3 with ham, no onions on 1/3 with turkey and only green peppers on the one with both.

SD: Uhhhh….

VB: That’s too many onions!!!!!

SD: Uhhhh….

VB: Oh just forget it.. I knew you’d ruin it. Just light mayo on all of them, mustard on the 1/3 with ham and just salt and pepper on the one with both and wrap them up so I can get out of here. I mean it’s not that hard and you guys find a way to ruin it every time.

SD: That’ll be 14.56 VB: What?! I thought the subs were 5 dollars?

SD: Most of them are…you ordered the Sweet Chicken Teriyaki which isn’t and chips.

VB: Oh, that’s how you rip people off, get them in here and change everything.

SD: Have a nice day miss.

VB:……………

I mean for fuck sake people it’s a goddamn sandwich shop. Use the ingredients and the suggested sandwich choices and be on your marry way. Why do people feel they have a right to go in and just make the subway servers day a fucking hell? It’s completely unnecessary. You don’t have the right to only pay 5 dollars but stack your sandwich with 35 dollars worth of produce. You don’t have the right to belittle the employees when they misjudge your made up measurements (remember, they’re not mind readers). You don’t have the right to demand for ingredients that Subway doesn’t have. And you don’t have the right think Subway is your kitchen, you can’t go around bossing the employees to change their cutting, mixing, spreading, baking, toasting or saucing protocols. It’s Subway and not your way. If you have a particular way you make your sandwich then you should probably make it yourself. You don’t do this elsewhere in your life, you don’t tell a contractor, “hmmm I don’t know think you should be laying that pipe work there.” You’re not allowed to go into a restaurants kitchen and tell the chef, “Oooo whoa! Whoa!! Ease up on that cayenne pepper on the broiled peppered halibut dish.” So stop being a pain in the ass customer. If there are too many peppers, too many onions, or olives when there shouldn’t be…guess what you lazy sloth, use your two hands and fix it. I’ve seen the tip jar, most people aren’t tipping these workers but sure as hell act like they are.

Why are people such asses when they’re allowed to participate in something?

In This Economy…

Has this current recession created a plausible excuse for Anarchy?

 

My roommate and a friend of ours got together and came up with a very pertinent observation. Now that this nation is facing yet another recession, a lot of people, businesses and commercials are now using the phrase “In this economy…” as an end all be all excuse for everything. For example, “In this economy, you want to get more bang for your buck.” (Thanks Toyota), or “In this economy, saving your pennies is becoming ever so important.” (Chase bank).

News reporters and political analysis are using the phrase to excuse ridiculous governmental decisions and poor choices by elected officials. “Well Stacy I’m out here with the Governor who is addressing the economic status of California, and wait, he just said he’s cutting all public school aid, metro link routing and assistance, stabbing all pregnant women in the stomach, and burning homeless people on sight. I mean in this economy, you really can’t take any chances. Back to you Stacy.”

 

I remember when the housing market began to crumble and analyst were begging the average American not to panic. Yet it seems everything in television is catered towards full scale cynicism and defeatist acceptance. Leading this wave of pre-apocalyptic financial devastation is the phrase… “In this economy”.

 

I think what gets me about this phrase, is it’s common sense umbrella effect. Things which would of seemed common sense to keep us out of this financial turmoil are now being hailed as never before thought of concepts and ideas. I mean did you have to say, “In this economy family means everything.”? So am I to believe I could care less my family when the economy isn’t shitty? “In this economy thinking wisely could save you money.” Hmmm….wouldn’t thinking wisely before this have saved us money and kept me out of this situation? It’s apparent we’re incapable of thinking wisely hence our current situation. “In this economy people are going back to the basics.” That’s nice, but don’t be fooled. People aren’t going back to the basics by choice. Maybe if they had of stuck with the basics we might have been in a better situation.

 

I just fear that now that people are accepting the phrase, “In this economy…” it’ll escalate to an excuse for far worst behavior. I mean things like:

 

“Man…oh man….dude, Dave I just killed a hooker.” “

“Awww man don’t worry about it. In this economy, you can’t afford to pay her. What else could you do?”

 

“Hey Debra, just do what I did…I left my son at the market”

“You did what?!!…”

“Yeah in this economy, I can’t afford to feed him. Why bring him home?”

“Damn girl! You’re right.”

 

“Hey bro, what the hell is this we’re eating?”

“Dog dude.”

“What?!”

“Yeah dog! I mean in this economy I can’t afford to pass up a cheap meal. Sure I live in this 4 bedroom house with two 20,000 dollar plus cars in the driveway, but in this economy, it’s just financially sound to capture stray dogs and eat them.

 

“Fuck! That movie sucked.”

“Yo son, in this economy, writers couldn’t afford to write a decent script.

 

“Laura, the defendant was convicted of felony assault, rape and aggravated larceny. And sentence to 15 years.”

“And ladies and gentlemen that brings this case to a well deserved conclusion.”

“That’s right Laura, but in this economy can you blame him? Goodnight, everybody.”

 

I know those are extreme, and ridiculous examples but how long will they be, especially in this economy?